Sweatpants: Why?

Alexander Wang’s influence notwithstanding, I am mystified by the sweatpants trend. Perhaps because I was born in the pre-Lycra, pre-wicking-material era, I associate baggy gray sweatpants with the general humiliation of high school gym class. Imagine running down the main street in town in the most unflattering clothes imaginable. It’s great that athletic clothes are now designed by people like Stella McCartney, but not so long ago, shapeless sweatpants were the only option. And they were horrible.

Nevertheless, women are now decking themselves in gray sweatpants material without being forced to by school uniform codes. This “jog top,” above, actually sold out at indie retailer Pixie Market. Why? Just the word “jog” is still cringe-inducing, especially when it’s anywhere near the words “heather gray.” Yet sweatpants are now everywhere. More examples, after the jump.

Here’s a sweatshirt cape. Not sure whether it was inspired by Wang or Columbine. You could definitely fit an Uzzi under there.

This eskandar sweatshirt and sweatpants combo is only $480 at Bergdorf Goodman! Maybe Champion will respond with a a diffusion line.

These Y-3 sweatpants with piping are actually pretty flattering. They’re also $250. Sadly, my high school clothing budget did not allow for uniform supplies from Net-a-Porter.

Here’s a sweatshirt dress by avant garde designer Tsumori Chisato. It’s actually pretty cool, but wait! It’s still sweatpants.

This sweatshirt by Karen Walker is literally called the “She’s Cracked Dress.” Hey, you said it. I think Dave Chappelle’s crackhead character also favored sweatsuit material for eveningwear.

Seemingly sane people even wore sweatpants to fashion shows – even to the Oscar de la Renta show, above.

These thin, draped sweatpants on a fellow fashion week photographer at the Marc by Marc Jacobs show looked good. Though she was wearing sweatpants, she was actually more dressed up than the other photographers.

Here is someone almost certainly too young to remember when sweatpants were the only option, clad head to toe in an oversize sweatsuit.

The only thing I can do to cheer myself up after sightings like this is watch this Break-Up Sweatpants sketch from Michael and Michael Have Issues. It’s either that or watch a few episodes of Amerika and reminisce about the good old days.